Not A Give Up.

"I've gotta lotta things to do tonight. I'm so sick of making lists, of things I'll never finish."

I've been living this way for a long time now.

"But If I had a little more time. to. kill. I'd settle every stupid little thing. Yeah. You'd think that I would."

I need a clean slate. My good friend made that point. He Said "N. Whatever you're looking for at _______. It's not there. You need to move on and find something new."

"I wonder if I'll ever lose my mind. I tried hard for awhile. But then I kinda gave up."

And he's right. I can feel summer creeping in me. I can feel all the same pain of this time last year.

"I so wanna get back on track. And I'll do whatever it takes. Even if it kills me."

Theres so much you want to know. So much I could tell you. If only. If only, you'd let me.

Do you have something you never realized means a lot to you? It's irrational. I know it is. But I realized it a few weeks back. Penguins make me think of my childhood.

They make me feel young. And happy. And not alone.

I could use a penguin right now. Because we're all just rushing towards nothing. And I'd atleast like a friend with me.

I wish I had more time to kill for you. But it might be all used up.

- N